Tag Archives: writing

Junk Journal Journey: Balancing Art and Life

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I am still struggling with my time management and don’t feel like I am achieving much at all at the moment (nothing art wise). I feel like I’m busy all the time, but, well you know how life is sometimes – it’s complicated.

I had been hoping to have figured out a way to photograph the whole of my Junk Journal by now and make a slide show. I even thought I’d be able to make a video of a flip through of the journal. But so far all I’ve managed to do is take one half decent photo of the first spread in the journal. There is a flap inside the front cover that obscures most of page 1 until it is opened up.

The quotes on the flap say: “The most important words we will ever utter are those we say to ourselves when we are by ourselves” Al Winter

The first signature of the journal was made from and old map. I cut out letters from magazines and spelled out the quote “All those who wander, are not lost”. I’ve always liked wandering and exploring.

I also pasted the pink paper with another quote onto that page. I used to have the quote on my desk at work to help boost my confidence.

Your life has purpose
Your story is important
Your dreams count
Your voice matters
You were born to make an impact.

To be honest though I don’t think I ever made much of an impact at work. I liked the people I worked with and I always did my best, but I was never very comfortable in the corporate environment. Still I stuck it out for nearly 30 years and it allowed me to purchase my home and have some decent holidays. I always got compliments about my work from my managers, but I wasn’t one to push myself forward or make a noise about my achievements. I was never that bothered about climbing the corporate ladder.

I have now realised that I don’t need to tell you what all the quotes in my journal say because if you click on any image on my blog you should be able to open it up larger and zoom in if you are interested in reading what it says. (Should you be interested).

Most of my time recently has been taken up in the garden so I am being busy but not with my art practice. About 10 years ago I made some raised beds to make the gardening a bit easier for T. This is what they looked like when finished.

A couple of years ago, when T was very unwell and unable to get into the garden at all for over a year, I noticed one of the beds was falling apart so I carried out some repairs. This year I noticed another of the beds (the one in the middle) was falling apart so I’m now in the process of repairing that one too. It was actually more damaged than I first realised so I am almost having to rebuild almost the whole thing. I had to order more wood so I’m having a few days break from the work while I’m waiting for it to be delivered. I think this will be the last time I will be able to do work like this. It’s very heavy, physical work and I’m getting older all the time. I’m still OK at the moment but things take longer and are more difficult for me now. I’m hoping that when I’ve finished this bed it will last a few more years. Realistically I can’t see T and I carrying on with the garden for much longer now. We’ll see.

I just realised that I must have made that video, but for the life of me I can’t remember how I did it. One day I’ll get time to figure it out again.

So that is my news for now, I will update you when this garden project is finished and then I have another one to work on before I can start to concentrate more on my art practice.

Take good care of yourselves
Big Love AJ xxxxx

I Finally Finished Something!

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The front of my Junk Journal box

This is the front cover of the box I made for my Junk Journal. The box label indicates it was finished in 2025. I set that date as a personal deadline, but I failed. I did finish the box before the end of the year. However, I still had some pages inside the journal to finish. They took longer than anticipated – don’t they always? The whole thing was finally finished in March 2026.

The year 2026 continues to pose challenges with more health issues for T. I won’t go into too much detail, but it has been tough for both of us. I had thought that with T’s heart surgery being such a success, everything would be OK now. I forgot about the mental health issues for a while.

T’s physical recovery has been slow, but his heart is much better now. All his check-ups are good, and the doctors are pleased with him. His broken rib has healed, but he still experiences back pain because of the wedge fractures in his spine. He has to take a lot of painkillers.

The MH issues are ongoing, we know there is no cure for this condition. Neither of us want him to go back on the medication that gave him symptoms of Parkinson’s Disease. We just have to learn to cope with the crises better. We’ve been through them many times before and no doubt, will again.

A break between the physical recovery and the most recent bipolar episode would have been nice. Unfortunately, it came on very fast and lasted a long time. It was very stressful. Sometimes I felt like I was losing my mind too! – I was exhausted I think I had carers’ burnout!

Right now, everything seems a little calmer. Some semblance of normality has returned for the time being. So I’m going to grab the opportunity to explain about my Junk Journal.

The Back of the Journal box

I started the junk journal in 2014. It was inspired by Teesha Moore in a post she made on the Artstronauts Club. As the name suggests the journal and box were made from junk. Scraps of paper, ephemera and things that were lying about on my work table at the time. All stitched together to form a rough book. I gave the box and journal shiny covers by covering them in clear packing tape.

For years and years I’ve collected ‘positive quotes’ and ‘words of wisdom’. I use these quotes a lot in my artwork to try and encourage myself to be more positive. I’ve always had a negative slant and have spent a lot of my life trying to turn that around. Sometimes I’m more successful than others.

I decided to fill my junk journal with some of the quotes I love and find inspiring. I also like playing around with different fonts and styles of writing.

Inside the box the journal is wrapped in tissue paper – as if it is something ‘precious’ ha, ha, ha!
Front cover of the journal inside
The inside of the box when the Junk Journal is taken out

Next time I post here I will start to share the inside of the Journal. I’m not sure how successful that will be because it’s quite hard to photograph, but I’ll try.

In the meantime take good care of yourselves.

Big Love AJ xxxxxxx

HAPPY NEW YEAR – OR IS IT?

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Hello friends,
I hope 2026 is going well for you. I wish you all the best this year. Unfortunately, for us it has brought more problems and stress.

T’s heart operation was a success, and his heart is functioning better now than it has in years. That’s the good news.

The problems started because we couldn’t get any pain relief for his broken rib. The break was not recorded on the discharge notes from the hospital. We only had paracetamol at home. T didn’t get to see a doctor over the holiday period. I wasted a lot of time, on the phone, trying to get him the help he needed.

T spent most of January in bed, trying not to move because of the pain. This had an effect on his mood  – the mood swings have become much more noticeable and difficult to manage. It has been difficult to get the mental health support he needs. This seems to be a common issue in the UK.

We also had a lot of ‘tech problems’ recently. I knew that our old computers would eventually stop working so we ordered new ones. They arrived around Xmas time. Now I realise that many of the advances in computing are completely unfathomable, and probably unnecessary for us senior citizens. It’s been an ordeal for me to try and work things out. I’m SLOWLY getting there. T doesn’t even know how to connect his new computer, and he’s not in the right headspace to try and figure it out just now.

I had intended to refocus my blog more on art and creativity this year.  Originally it was just about art journaling, but Health issues have taken over. I’m going to try harder to refocus. I know that things will get better, and eventually I’ll get back to normal (whatever that is).

The image at the top is another page from my Paint and Doodles journal.

Take very good care of yourselves and, hopefully, I’ll be back soon.
Big Love

AJ

The Long Wait is over!

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I’ve been away for a while again because, out of the blue, I received a phone call from Southampton Hospital on Friday 5 December advising me that T’s operation was scheduled for 17 December. T had just gone out to see his therapist when I received the call so I had to wait until he got home to tell him. I was really pleased that it wouldn’t be necessary for us to travel to a foreign country to get it done now, but he immediately went into shock and subsequently through the whole spectrum of emotions before we got to the hospital. By the time he went to the Theatre for his op on 17/12 he had come to terms with everything and was mentally in the right space.

His operation went really well, he spent one night in Intensive Care, then a couple nights in the High Dependency Unit before returning to a normal ward. He had to be put on a 12 hour drip because he was so dehydrated and they also sorted out a couple of other problems. Although the op went well the surgeon accidentally broke one of T’s ribs (he apologised when he did he ward rounds and saw T after the op). The new valve has settled in nicely and his heart is functioning better than it has for years. Unfortunately the pain from the broken rib is delaying his recovery a bit, but it gets slightly better every day. He was discharged from the hospital on 24 December and we got home at about 4:30pm. The trip home (which involved a half hour taxi ride from the hospital to the ferry terminal; a short wait then a half hour fast cat ferry ride to the Island – the sea was rough that day which caused T more pain and caused me to feel sea sick!; then a slightly longer taxi ride home) he was exhausted by the time we got home and in need of more pain relief then went straight to bed for a rest.

The lovely cats were pleased to see us and we were pleased to see them.

Christmas Day was very quiet, T slept and rested most of the time. I took the opportunity to go and visit my Mum and when I got home I cooked a ‘sort of Xmas Dinner’ in the evening.

Each day things are getting better and we are optimistic that he will be healthier and able to do more in the future. However he is still in heart failure, that will be treated and hopefully improved by medication, the pace maker, exercise and diet.

While T was in hospital I was able to stay near to him in Heartbeat House again. I am so grateful that place exists, it’s clean, warm, safe and full of other people away from their homes and caring for relatives who are heart patients. Some of the people I made friends with at HBH had to stay there over Christmas but I know they will have supported each other and it’s important that our loved ones are looked after and helped to recover.

So because of all of the above I haven’t had much time for creativity again in the past month. Today I am sharing a small project I did earlier in the year – a birthday card for my friend Claudine. It’s called an Explosion Book (or Squash Book). The two images above show both sides of the book/card ‘exploded’ but it all squashes down to a small square. I forgot to take a picture of it squashed!

Here is a quick YouTube tutorial on how to make one There are longer and more detailed tutorials available if you search for them.

For anyone who is reading this I hope you had a lovely Christmas. People who know me well know that I’m really not a big fan of Christmas but nevertheless I hope you all enjoyed it. I do however wish you all the best for Good Health and Happiness in the New Year.

Big Love from me
AJ xxxxx

See you next year!

A Bit of this and that!

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Hello, I hope you are keeping well and enjoying life.

Things have been a bit hectic for me since we got back from our successful trip to London.

T has been sleeping a lot because he is tired all the time now. He wrote to the hospital in Southampton (who have told him he will get his ‘urgent’ heart surgery ‘some time’ in the next year) to ask if they will be monitoring his heart in the meantime. He got a rather abrupt and unfriendly answer to say that no they will not be monitoring him but if he becomes unwell he should report to our local hospital for emergency treatment.

He is losing all confidence in the team at Southampton now. Luckily he is seeing the local Heart Failure Nurse early next week and he finally got an appointment to see his GP the next day.

When he was first told that his only option for surgery was Transapical TAVI, (a very specialised and complex type of keyhole surgery) he was told that he was not ‘optimal’ for the surgery at that time because his Aortic valve was functioning ‘OK’ (apparently 25% performance is deemed OK!?) but if it was left too long there might be too much damage to his heart and then he would be unable to have the surgery. So the fact that they don’t want to monitor him is naturally a bit worrying.

T has been researching other options. He first looked into being transferred to another UK hospital but they all have long waiting lists for NHS patients. Although going private could probably expedite the surgery to a few weeks, the cost in the UK is prohibitive. He’s now considering going abroad for private surgery, which, including return flights for two and accommodation, is about half the price of having the operation done in the UK (still a lot of money though). I have told him he needs to investigate what the insurance cost will be as I’m sure it will be very high with all of his other health problems which all have to be declared. I want to be sure that if he needs a medivac flight to get home one will be available.

Naturally I am very anxious about all of this (the delay, the lack of ‘customer service’ from the team at Southampton, the difficulty of getting care from the NHS – due to years of underfunding from successive governments, etc. etc.) and I am pleased he will be seeing the two local professional people who know him and appear to care about him.

When I’ve managed to find a bit of ‘me time’ I’ve been trying to finish a Junk Journal I started in 2014 as well as making a box to contain it. It’s completely made from junk and rubbish and I’ve filled it with quotes that are meaningful to me (the delightful content). I’ve just got one more page to finish and a few tags to decorate and then I can mark that one as ‘complete’ too. Hopefully I will get it done before the end of the year as I’ve already noted on the box that it was started in 2014 and completed in 2025 🙂 Here is a little glimpse of the inside and the box:

Yesterday we had our very last session of the Arts and Craft group run by CarersIW. It’s a bit sad it has come to an end because it was a lovely group of carers and we all supported each other through difficult times. Often the room was filled with laughter. Yesterday we decorated cardboard gingerbread men for a community Christmas tree.

Back Row L-R Cheryl, Debbie, Denise and Julie
Front Row L-R Lucy (who led the group until recently) Marcus who took over from Lucy, Sarah and me!

The group used to be a lot bigger but in recent months the numbers have dwindled and the decision was taken to bring it to an end. Very sad but I think it was the right decision. I have been invited to join another group on a different day. The Self Care Cafe is centred more on the individual and includes things like mindfulness, breathing, meditation, calming music and sometimes there is also a craft element. This week we made ‘natural weaves’. My effort is at the top of this post. The frame is made from driftwood tied together, the warp is made from paper string and the weft includes all sorts of bits and pieces collected from the beach and gardens and some extra bits tied on. It was a really lovely exercise to do and I was quite pleased with the result of mine. Everyone did something different and they were all lovely.

The weather in the UK got colder recently and I remembered some time ago (probably a couple of years) I purchased everything I needed (fabric and mechanisms) to make two Roman Blinds for T’s room. He has 2 large windows in his room one south facing and the other east facing. They already have curtains but the blinds will improve the insulation. I thought making the blinds would be a quick and easy task afterall it just involves sewing straight lines, but it’s turned into a bit of marathon.

Part of the problem is getting into his room, because he sleeps a lot I don’t like to disturb him but I also need daylight for measuring and fitting, there’s a bit of drilling and hammering involved, climbing up and down step ladders and quite a lot of groaning and swearing! Currently it gets dark at about 4pm so my window of opportunity to get the job done is limited! Sometimes he stays in bed until early afternoon! Today I should get the first blind competed and then I am hoping that the second one will be quicker as I now know what I need to do and hopefully won’t make as many mistakes. The blinds have blackout and thermal linings to keep the heat in during the winter and out during the summer. If I ever need more blinds I’ll pay someone else to make them. I’ve realised that now I am a ‘senior’ things that used to be quick and simple take much longer and seem more complicated!

My other exciting news that I will tell you about nearer the time or maybe after the event is that I have signed up for a 5 day Art Retreat in the south of France with my favourite artist next summer. It sold out almost immediately and I was lucky to get a place. I am so excited about this 🙂 ❤


That’s all for now, keep creative friends 🙂
Big love from me
AJ xxxxx ❤❤❤

We are Well and Truly back on the Roller Coaster Ride now!

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My life’s been a bit chaotic again recently – Sometimes good, sometimes really not so good, but at least never boring.

I am managing to get some creativity in and that is good for me. I’m unsure about the results of my creativity in terms of success, but I know that even if the result is rubbish the act of being creative is definitely good for me. The image above is another page from my Paint and Doodle journal. Maybe next time I will remember to show you a before and after image, we’ll see.

T’s mood swings seem to be back with a vengeance and changing quite fast. When he’s up and happy he is being very creative and doing lots of music and writing projects. It is lovely to hear music filling the house again, it’s been a long time. He gets very little sleep at these times and that can trigger mania which currently presents as him being angry and ranty and then that is usually followed by a depressive episode. When he’s down he just switches off, shuts down and spends days in bed. It’s not lazyness but more like paralysis. It’s been the pattern for much of our lives together for the past 55 years … Still can’t quite get used to it although I think/hope I understand it better now.

On top of that T’s physical condition is not getting any better so there’s very little he can do around the house or garden, even when he is motivated to do so. Still no news as to when he might get his heart surgery! But all that aside his cognitive function is so much better now he is not taking all those psyche meds and if I catch him at the right time (when he’s not completely down in the dumps or so ‘up’ he can’t stop talking and ranting) we can now have fairly reasonable conversations. His memory is still shockingly bad but doesn’t seem to be getting any worse atm, and, to be honest, my memory is also not as good as it used to be. I guess that’s what happens with aging 😦 We make a right pair of confused seniors!

I hope life is treating you well.
Big Love
AJ xxx